Oh my god, I can't even................. (Week of 8/19/2023)

 

Hello everyone and uh.......... I guess the countdown has gone to complete shit now, if you haven't guessed from the picture I used, our new #1 ruined what would have been a completely solid week otherwise. I'll go over that at the end of this post. But first, here is the one song that left this week:

TXT/ Jonas Brothers- Do It Like That (#24 last week)

Countdown:

30. Doja Cat- Paint The Town Red (=)

29. Kylie Minogue- Padam Padam (-2)

28. Olivia Rodrigo- Bad Idea Right (Debut)

27. New Jeans- Super Shy (+2)

26. Post Malone- Enough Is Enough (+2)

25. Nicki Minaj/ Ice Spice/ Aqua- Barbie World (-3)

24. Fall Out Boy- Hold Me Like A Grudge (+2)

23. Lil Durk/ Morgan Wallen- Stand By Me (+2)

22. Billie Eilish- What Was I Made For (-1)

21. Noah Kahan/ Post Malone- Dial Drunk (-1)

20. Miley Cyrus- Jaded (-2)

19. David Guetta/ Anne Marie/ Coi Leray- Baby Don't Hurt Me (-8)

18. Ed Sheeran- Eyes Closed (-2)

17. Sza- Snooze (-2)

16. Benson Boone- In The Stars (+7)

15. Jungkook/ Latto- Seven (+4)

14. Jonas Brothers- Waffle House (=)

13. Dominic Fike- Mona Lisa (=)

12. Fall Out Boy- We Didn't Start The Fire (=)

11. The Weeknd/ Madonna/ Playboi Carti- Popular (-2)

10. OneRepublic- Runaway (=)

9. Lil Durk/ J Cole- All My Life (+8)

8. Olivia Rodrigo- Vampire (-2)

7. Jonas Brothers- Summer Baby (+1)

6. Doechii- What It Is (+1)

5. Dua Lipa- Dance The Night (-2)

4. Harry Styles- Satellite (=)

3. Fifty Fifty- Cupid (+2)

2. Crash Adams- Give Me A Kiss (-1)

1. Taylor Swift- Cruel Summer (+1) (I'll rant hard later)

Countdown Extra- Charli Xcx- Speed Drive

Last Year's #1: Nicky Youre/ Dazy- Sunroof

#1 Two Years Ago: Ed Sheeran- Bad Habits

My Favorite Song Last Year: Black Eyed Peas/ Shakira/ David Guetta- Don't You Worry

My Favorite Song Two Years Ago: Justin Wellington/ Small Jam- Iko Iko

Recommendations For Hits 1: Steve Aoki/ Trinix/ Akon- Locked Up and Barenaked Ladies- Lovin Life

We have one debut this week, and it's the pretty disappointing second single off Olivia Rodrigo's album Guts that drops later this year, called Bad Idea Right. As I said last week, I'm not sure what she's trying to do in the verses, but they don't work out very well. This is far better than Good 4 U, however, because the production and chorus sound pretty normal, saving the song from being bad at all.

Hitbound

Charli Xcx- Speed Drive

Paul Russell- Lil Boo Thang (Debut)

Peggy Gou- It Goes Like (Debut)

Charlie Puth- Lipstick (Debut)

Aespa- Better Things (Debut)

Charlie On A Friday- Im Not Crazy

Crash Adams- Sugar Mommy

Max/ Jvke/ Bazzi- Strings

Travis Scott/ The Weeknd/ Bad Bunny- Kpop

Jelly Roll- Need A Favor

Will.i.am/ Britney Spears- Mind Your Business

Lauv- Love U Like That

Flyana Boss- You Wish

Diplo/ Jessie Murph/ Polo G- Heartbroken

(Gi)- Dle- I Do (Re-entry)

Chris Brown- Summer Too Hot (Debut)

Ok, this first debut by a random newcomer is a banger. So we have Lil Boo Thang by Paul Russell, and this is amazing. Paul Russell's flow is completely on point and the production is completely on point. I hope this is huge.

We have another newcomer up next, this is It Goes Like by Peggy Gou. This is also really good. It's an EDM Song, so the production is super cool. Peggy Gou also sounds pretty good here. My one complaint here is that there could be a few verses in here, but it's fine, it was executed as good as Ferrari from last year, so a lot better than Do It To It.

Up next, Charlie Puth made an R&B song called Lipstick. This is about making a relationship official with someone you have a crush on, so this is pretty relatable to me. Charlie Puth sounds pretty good here and it has interesting song. So yeah, very good song.

I think we remember Aespa from their HB dropout Life's Too Short last year, which I found pretty good for Kpop standards. Today, they bring us Better Things. This is also pretty good. They all sound pretty good and this has interesting production. So sort of a guilty pleasure again.

I do by (Gi)- Dle re-entered. Ok, cool.

Lastly, Chris Brown is back for the first time since Go Crazy with Young Thug three years ago. His new song is called Summer Too Hot, and it's just good. He sounds good and I like the production, but I sort of wish it was in a different key than what it is in. But it's fine.

We lost Barbie Dreams, Can You Hear Me, AM:PM, and Supposed To Be Loved. Barbie Dreams was getting extremely annoying, so I'm glad that's gone. Can You Hear Me and Supposed To Be Loved were great and deserved more than one week in HB if not debuting the countdown. And I'm not sure what the point of bringing back AM:PM four months later if it was just going to leave the following week. Oh well, I guess I will never understand Mikey Piff.

Blurbs:

We had one exit this week, Do It Like That by TXT and the Jonas Brothers. I'm not sure this is gone for good since it's probably in the abyss now, but we'll see.

Oh god, please don't let Paint The Town Red stay #30 next week.

Why did Padam Padam drop two spots off its debut? I hope it jumps next week.

Could we just get Jaded out of here soon please?

Baby Don't Hurt Me looks like it's now on it's way out. I still like this one, in fact, it could very well be top 10 for me when I do the countdown extras rankdown at the end of the year.

Moderately surprised In The Stars is almost in the top 15. But I'm not complaining at all.

Also surprised All My Life is in the top 10. I was never expecting either Lil Durk or J Cole to get a top 10 hit on here, but I'm also not complaining here.

For the first time in a while, Dance The Night is neither #3 nor #4. Just thought I'd throw that out.

And now for the moment you've all been waiting for.

OH MY FUCKING GOSH! FUCK YOU SHITS 1! WHY THE ACTUAL FUCKING FUCK DOES CRUEL SUMMER BY TAYLOR FUCKING SWIFT HAVE TO BE #1 FOUR FUCKING YEARS AFTER THAT GODDAMN ALBUM LOVER CAME OUT? EVERYONE KNOWS MY TWO LEAST FAVORITE TYPES OF MUSIC ARE TAYLOR SWIFT SONGS AND SONGS THAT GO VIRAL TOO FUCKING LONG AFTER THEIR FUCKING RELEASES, AND THIS IS A GODDAMN EXAMPLE OF BOTH TYPES OF SONGS, AND NOW I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKING TAYLOR SWIFT STANNING HAS GOTTEN WORSE THAN EVER NOW THAT MIDNIGHTS IS STILL TOO FUCKING POPULAR, SPEAK NOW TAYLOR'S VERSION IS ALSO HERE AND COMPLETELY OVERSHADOWING THE LONG AWAITED RELEASES OF PINK TAPE BY LIL UZI VERT AND UTOPIA BY TRAVIS SCOTT, TWO ALBUMS THAT DESERVED FAR MORE FUCKING ATTENTION, AND THIS SINGLE GODDAMN SINGLE OFF LOVER THAT IS BLOWING UP ON TIKTOK AND CAUSING EVERYONE TO CLAIM IT IS THE ONLY SONG THAT MATTERS TO THEM AND DESERVES TO BE BLASTED EVERYWHERE... WELL I'VE GOT FUCKING NEWS FOR ALL YOU JACKASSES WHO OVERPLAY THE SHIT OUT OF THIS SONG THESE DAYS: IT'S FUCKING NOT. AND WHOEVER THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD FUCKING IDEA TO MAKE THAT TIKTOK VIDEO CONTAINING CRUEL SUMMER CAN SUCK MY DICK REAL FUCKING HARD. BECAUSE THESE DAYS, TAYLOR SWIFT STANNING HAS GOTTEN TOO OUT OF HAND, AND YOUR FUCKING DECISION TO USE THAT SONG IN A TIKTOK VIDEO ONLY FUCKING WORSENED MY HATRED TOWARDS TAYLOR SWIFT MUSIC. OH, AND DID I HEAR THAT SHE IS WORKING ON FUCKING 1989 TAYLOR'S VERSION? YES, I UNFORTUNATELY DIN, AND THAT'S A COMPLETE FUCKING PROBLEM OF ITS OWN, BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL 1989 CONTAINED FUCKING SHAKE IT OFF, WHICH IS BY FAR HER MOST FUCKING OVERRATED SONG SO I'M NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING HOW THE STANS TREAT SHAKE IT OFF TAYLOR'S VERSION. I FORGOT TO MENTION, WE ARE LIKELY DOING THE ORIGINAL SHAKE IT OFF AS A PEP TUNE IN MARCHING BAND THIS YEAR, AND THAT'S JUST FUCKING DEPRESSING DURING AN ERA WHEN TAYLOR SWIFT STANNING IS COMPLETELY OUT  OF HAND. AS FOR CRUEL SUMMER HITTING #1, THIS IS WORSE THAN WHEN ANTI HERO AND KARMA HIT #1 DUE TO IT BEING FROM FOUR YEARS AGO. I JUST WISH THIS HAD STAYED OFF THE COUNTDOWN AFTER LEAVING IN JULY 2020, THEN WE WOULDN'T EVEN BE IN THIS FUCKING BOAT. THIS BETTER NOT BE #1 NEXT WEEK OR ELSE WE WILL HAVE SOME SERIOUS FUCKING PROBLEMS. SO ONCE AGAIN, FUCK YOU SHITS 1. Ok, rant over.

I guess that does it for me this week, see you guys next week.